me- hi just answering my bleep
nurse- doctor doctor please come quick,
me- sorry???
nurse- please i cannot explain, come to wellington ward please hurry.
me- OK ill come now
me- fuck: drop sandwich on table and run from the west wing to the east wing of a big London hosp.
arrive at wellington ward,
nurse- please doctor see the patient, he has something wrong with his head
me- confused, enter room, patient watching TV,
nurse- he has a hole in his head
me- hello sir, how are u today?
patient- I'm fine, dunno what she is on about hole in the head, i had a craniotomy years ago and have had an odd shaped skull since.
nurse- doctor doctor please come quick,
me- sorry???
nurse- please i cannot explain, come to wellington ward please hurry.
me- OK ill come now
me- fuck: drop sandwich on table and run from the west wing to the east wing of a big London hosp.
arrive at wellington ward,
nurse- please doctor see the patient, he has something wrong with his head
me- confused, enter room, patient watching TV,
nurse- he has a hole in his head
me- hello sir, how are u today?
patient- I'm fine, dunno what she is on about hole in the head, i had a craniotomy years ago and have had an odd shaped skull since.
I was bleeped by a nurse whilst a new HO.
I answered dutifully within 20 seconds.
Nurse answers and says "can I put you on hold?"
I say "no" and put the phone down.
My hatred of the bleep started then.
I answered dutifully within 20 seconds.
Nurse answers and says "can I put you on hold?"
I say "no" and put the phone down.
My hatred of the bleep started then.
ward sister: "this pt needs to be reviewed"
me: "are they unwell?"
sister: "no, but he hasn't been seen this weekend"
me: "well, unless he's unwell we wouldn't routinely see all medical pts over the weekend"
sister: "our pts get seen, he needs to be reviewed"
me: "we are the team from last night and have handed over as we were supposed to finish at 10am, so can you please bleep them if there are issues that need to be sorted out?"
sister: "this is not good enough, I'm going to document that i have told you about it"
me: "fine, can i also document that i have finished my shift and am supposed to be at home sleeping!
me: "are they unwell?"
sister: "no, but he hasn't been seen this weekend"
me: "well, unless he's unwell we wouldn't routinely see all medical pts over the weekend"
sister: "our pts get seen, he needs to be reviewed"
me: "we are the team from last night and have handed over as we were supposed to finish at 10am, so can you please bleep them if there are issues that need to be sorted out?"
sister: "this is not good enough, I'm going to document that i have told you about it"
me: "fine, can i also document that i have finished my shift and am supposed to be at home sleeping!
Nurse: We need a discharge summary on this lady
Me: I did it last night
Nurse: Well we can't find it
Me: I saw the HCA take it to pharmacy yesterday
Nurse: Well maybe she didn't do it properly because we can't find it. You need to do it again.
Me: Have you phoned pharmacy to make sure they've got the form?
Nurse: .....no. Are you going to do the summary again, only this patient is ready to go home.
Me: No. call pharmacy to make sure they've got the form. If they haven't, find the HCA that was on and ask her what she did with it.
Nurse: So you're not coming to do the discharge summary?
I hang up.
Me: I did it last night
Nurse: Well we can't find it
Me: I saw the HCA take it to pharmacy yesterday
Nurse: Well maybe she didn't do it properly because we can't find it. You need to do it again.
Me: Have you phoned pharmacy to make sure they've got the form?
Nurse: .....no. Are you going to do the summary again, only this patient is ready to go home.
Me: No. call pharmacy to make sure they've got the form. If they haven't, find the HCA that was on and ask her what she did with it.
Nurse: So you're not coming to do the discharge summary?
I hang up.
Me: "Hi, it's the plastics reg, you bleeped me?"
Management: "It's hospital admin, we need you to discharge patients because we're short of beds"
Me: "Have you had a look at our inpatient list? We don't have any patients"
Management "Well, discharge who you can"
Management: "It's hospital admin, we need you to discharge patients because we're short of beds"
Me: "Have you had a look at our inpatient list? We don't have any patients"
Management "Well, discharge who you can"
A particularly dim nurse (who even the rest of the nursing staff on my ward feel is a total muppet) bleeped me despite the fact I was standing right beside her!
To be fair, the reacton of all the other nurses was priceless when I calmly picked up the other telephone extension and replied to the bleep!
To be fair, the reacton of all the other nurses was priceless when I calmly picked up the other telephone extension and replied to the bleep!
and find someone who looks a bit worried in the waiting area and then walk up to them and say:
"I'm terribly sorry - we lost him."
"I'm terribly sorry - we lost him."